Wake Up Smit

This is my Blog, I'll write what I think, what I like to share with everyone. I do not claim to be the originator of all collections here. I get these through, email, books, movies amongst other sources; makin it difficult to always give credit to the Author. It is just my attempt to liven up LIFE which is in any case too serious. There is no discrimination - racial or otherwise involved. If you see something you do not like, please feel free to move on!

Thursday, January 6, 2011

IPL 2015

Napoleon Nayudu prepared to face another ball, several thoughts raced 
through his mind. After being bought by the Gummidipoondi Gumboils for an 
astronomical $5 million in the 2015 Indian Premier League (IPL) auction, he 
knew he had a reputation to keep up.   Should he try a 
straightforward Toyota Front Foot Drive this time, or should he aim for a 
Bombay Dyeing Cover Drive ? Or perhaps an ITC Square Cut (Statutory 
warning:Smoking is Injurious to Health) would be a better idea?   
He realised he needed to hit an IBM boundary soon. Ever since IBM had 
announced they would pay Rs 1 lakh per boundary and Rs 5 lakh for a six, he 
had been trying to run less and hit more.   Unfortunately, he hadn't been 
doing either in this match, because the Begusarai Bandits had some very good 
bowlers.   The next ball, he played a Pepsi Inside Edge onto his Maggi 
middle stump and trudged wearily off the field to the accompaniment of boos 
from the Vodafone Zoozoo stand at the Kellogg's Special K-Cereal stadium in 
Gummidipoondi.   Relaxing in the Parle Glucose commentary box, Saurav 
Ganguly ruminated on the momentous changes in the game that had occurred 
since the IPL came into being. In 2010, he remembered, the game started to 
really grow, with huge sums of money being paid for the Pune and Kochi 
teams.   Teams soon started springing up like frogs in the monsoon. And 
when the Gorakhpur Gorillas won the IPL in 2012, every district town in the 
country wanted its own side.   The IPL season was extended to six months 
in the year, then to 12 months and soon, once the villages started having 
their own sides, you had matches on all 365 days a year, 24 hours a day. 
Industrialists sold off their old companies and bought IPL teams. Twenty 
five of the 30 Sensex stocks were of cricketing companies. Advertisers 
fought with each other to sponsor matches, stadiums, sixes, fours, shots, 
balls, wickets and what not. Every patch of the players' clothing, his arm 
guard, helmet, and pads was covered in advertisements. Tendulkar Itch Guard 
Crotch Guards started a new trend in merchandising, Guard Crotch Guards started a new trend in merchandising, selling like hot 
cakes.   As the money flowed in, players' salaries zoomed. Everybody wanted to be a 
cricketer. Engineering and medical colleges were deserted and Indian 
Institutes of Management converted themselves into institutes of cricketing 
management. C.K. Prahalad's Chela ( The Guru being no more ) lectured on the 
pot of gold at the bottom of the leg stump.   Meanwhile, Finance Minister 
Lalit Modi mooted a radical proposal in the Lok Sabha for nationalising the 
Board of Control for Cricket in India , pointing out that its profits would 
wipe out the government's fiscal deficit. Food production had suffered, he 
said, as villagers refused to till their fields and spent their time playing 
cricket instead. A law prohibiting the transformation of arable land into 
cricket pitches was swiftly passed. A resolution to install a statue of 
Lalit Modi in Parliament was also adopted unanimously.   Back in the 
commentary box, Ganguly did a rapid mental calculation and told his 
listeners that Napoleon was now being paid the equivalent of Rs 10 lakh per 
run. A twinge of regret passed through him - during the IPL season in 2010, 
he recalled, he had been paid only about Rs 1.8 lakh per run. He needed to 
make more money, he thought. Maybe he would join Navjot Sidhu in The Great 
Indian Laughter Challenge and be paid lakhs for laughing. For the rest of 
the match, he practised laughing hysterically at each ball.


Love,
Smit

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